September 17th, 2010

The Pope is a Tea Partier??!!

Picture of an idiot Nazi: the Pope

Raising the roof...

Why didn’t somebody warn me about this??! WTF?

Yesterday His Somethingness, Pope Benedict (talk about the name not fitting the person) went over a litany of textbook Tea Party complaints during a rally, er… “mass,” in London.

Among these were: that religion is being marginalized (specially Christianity), that the “secularists” are out to suffocate religion’s voice, and my all-time favorite…THAT XMAS IS UNDER ATTACK!!!!!

Quick! Somebody call Bill O’Reilly! The Pope has stolen his writing team!! OMG, I never imagined I would enjoy so much a speech by a Pope!

What ever you do, DO NOT drink lassi when watching this BBC video, or it might come out your nose.

Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

OK. So before I go off subject, here are some quick numbers on Christianity:

  1. Adherents: 2.2 billion (32% of 6.7 billion humans)
  2. Vatican Bank‘s assets: $3.4 billion (this doesn’t reflect dividends, art treasures and other gains)
  3. Christians who live under impoverished conditions: 1.3 billion (aprox.)
  4. Growth rate of Christians in the World: 2.3%
  5. Hypocrisy of the Vatican: incalculable.

So I think I have a solution for the poor Pope’s  predicament. Why don’t we take $2 billion, out of those 3.4, and give $10,000 to every poor family on the planet? Wait, wait, I’m not done… We do it during Christmas!! Bada-bing! That would solve his two problems in one swoop.

Can you imagine?

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