October 30th, 2010

Cupcakes

I went to an awesome dance performance tonight by equally awesome Yung-li Chen. It was on the West Village–on Westbeth to be exact–and on the way back I walked past Magnolia Bakery. The smell of sugar in that place is enough to raise your glucose by 50 points!  😛 Anyway, I saw all the frosting slathered cakery through the shop windows and later went into a 5-minute mental rant on cupcakes. Here it is:

cake impostorCupcakes. Could someone please explain this freak of nature to me?? (Yes, this is one of those obnoxious posts).

I’m sorry but no matter how many things I become acclimatized to in the US (many of which I love), I still can’t wrap my head (or digestive track) around this culinary abomination. Actually, while we’re at it let’s throw donuts in there as well!

A cupcake is nothing more than a piece of lazy-ass cake! No care in the making, no occasion to have it, or the gathering of people which usually calls for that much sugar consumption.

Why do people talk about how “this or that-a-place has great cupcakes…”? Let’s get something straight right away: cupcakes are not, will not, and have never been “great.” You don’t believe me? OK. Then try this: have a slice of cake (a good, well made, fine cake) and then go for a cupcake. Disgusting isn’t? Yet a second slice of that cake would totally kick ass right now, wouldn’t it? Yeah, go for that second slice, you know you want another one..mmh

Granted. They look cute as hell, but the minute you bite into them the taste doesn’t match your expectation. I mean, they don’t taste like cake, and they don’t even come in a cup. WTF??

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